Pissed Off Spiders

Hello there, I am Larry Lumberjackin, here to tell you about forest be gone! Got a nasty spider problem? Creepers stuck up your tail pipe? Then you need to use forest be gone! This amazing product gets rid of anything standing in your way. It quickly removes trees, creepers, spiders, cows, pigs, chickens, grass and possibly even you. Forest be gone is a simple mixture of fire and more fire. So simple and easy to use, call today and will send you not one, but sets of forest be gone.

So if you can’t tell from that minecraft is making me a little cranky this week. Never fear if you enjoyed the road_trip series, there will be a new episode this Sunday. The problem is I like playing it with enemies around, but that is making building problematic now. When I first started playing the game back in Alpha, I played on normal. It was a challenge and the first few days on any world could be eventful. Once I got more in to building I turned it down to easy. It seems as the beta rolls on easy is no bargain either. If you saw the first road trip episode you saw the shot of the creepers around my night shelter. Yeah there were 6 of the damn things right around the building and two more in the distance. If that isn’t bad enough this week another of my night shelters was surrounded by a dozen spiders. That is when the forest be gone system came in to play. Oh, almost forgot about the three creepers mixed in with the spiders. This seems a bit excessive for easy. Maybe it’s just me, either way I am going to be a pansy and play on peaceful to do the road_trip segments. I will use my other worlds for challenging myself with hordes of monsters.

I have about kicked the teeth out of bulletstorm at this point. Currently on my third play through of the single player and I have run each echo mode map once. I haven’t had much to do with anarchy mode yet as I hate playing with randoms. None of the normal crew is willing to purchase the game at this point, so deep anarchy play will have to wait. Bulletstorm was easily worth sixty dollars and would be a shame to pass on at lower prices. This experience has made me want to gamble even more on games. The day the UPS truck showed up with my copy I was a little nervous. I had a decent idea the game was good, but there was still a chance for complete suck. I realized just a couple days ago that is how I should feel when getting a new game. It use to be how I felt about all new game purchases, before the instant news internet showed up. Plus I would have had to go on Wonderpod and tell the audience how taking a chance blew up in my face after ranting about it for so long. Now it has embolden me to get even crazier with my choices. So I will be going with HomeFront next and followed by Brink in May. Right now it looks like BF 3 will be the first franchise shooter I purchase. There is a chance Gears 3 will suck me in if the crew goes riot in horde mode. Basically COD and Crysis 2 can go suck it. Oh and if you have no idea what Brink is go catch up.

WARNING THE LAST PARAGRPH IS MEAN AND NOT POLITICALLY CORRECT AT ALL!!!

 

I am getting sick and tired of fat people using there immense size as a fucking disability. Your not disabled your fat!! Three specific incidents have brought finally brought this rage to the page. All occurred within the last six months and just drove me nuts. The first occurred when I was in Walmart. I was kneeled down in an aisle getting body wash, when a sudden pain shot through my foot. I look up to see this putrid pile of flesh riding one of those little carts. She has just mashed my foot with the bloody thing, No excuse me, no apology, hell if I hadn’t gotten out of her way I may have been under the damn thing. I ignored that one, no point in screaming at the rude idiot. She was so fat the poor cart was barely functioning. The second one happens every time I got to my local gas station. The stations manager has a strip marked with no parking around the entrance to the building. It is so clearly marked that Ray fucking Charles could see it. Still every time I am there, some numb nuts is parked in it. The standard tactic is for one fatty to sit in the car and wait while the other one waddles in the store to scrounge ding dongs. The parking spots are like fifty feet from the front door! Really fatty Mcfatterson, you can’t manage to waddle that distance. You have to inconvience the rest of the world to get your junk food fix? The last one was the one that caused this rant. I was at the court house yesterday dealing with business matters. I was parked three spaces down from a handicapped spot. A van full of obese people park in the spot. Every last member of this family was huge. The kids made me almost want to weep how young and yet obese they were. I watched a van with an obviously wheel chair bound man in the back have to circle the block several times to find him a parking spot he could use.

The last example I blame on the state of California. You idiots need to stop letting fat fuckers off easy. It is not I repeat not a fucking disability. You are not special your fucking fat. Drop the ruffles, get off the couch and go outside. Look I have sympathy if your obese and trying to lose weight and make yourself a better person. I just hate these entitled fucks who seem to think we need to cater to them because they are the size of zeppelins. Well now I feel better, hopefully the easily offended stopped at the warning.

 

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2 Responses to “Pissed Off Spiders”

  1. PatMan says:

    "Really fatty Mcfatterson, you can’t manage to waddle that distance"

    lol THIS made me laugh.

  2. G says:

    I have the exact same sentiment about the obese parking in handicapped spots. As ironic as it is, Audio Master G suffers from a hearing impairment. Weird, huh? Of course, that technically is a disability I suppose. But I can handle walking 15 feet.